Laurel was a girl I knew
Made of dirt and stone
Pretty hip in younger years
But now she sits alone
With a hundred thousand
Architectural disasters that she calls homes
And Beverly Glen was pretty
All the rich boys loved her curves
She tried to get the credit sometimes
More than she deserved
Like those cheesy 80's movies
Epitomizing all things
We'd come to know
And Beachwood was a boheme
From the sexy 60's scene
Grew up east of West Hollywood
And somewhere in between
All the madness Laurel puts up with, but
Somehow, always tolerates a scene
And Nichols, you know, had a way
With the performing arts
A and R guys having cookouts
On his back with superstars
But he had some nasty habits and
Some potholes to cover up this drama queen
Sometimes Beachwood yelled at Laurel
On the terms of selling out
Then Laurel yelled at Beverly
For not knowing what life's about
With her trust fund, friends and family
It felt just like an earthquake
When she'd shout
And Silverlake just stood there
With her nose up in the air
Pushing up her horn rimmed glasses, saying
I don't fucking care!
'Bout the drama all you idiots are buying
Selling, and leasing up there
And San Fernando was a struggling actor
Drove a deli truck
On to the sets of porno movies
He was just trying to make a buck
While his pilot was an escrow
He dreamed of dating Beverly one day