The Foolish Frog

The Foolish Frog

There was once a farmer
Walking down the road whistling a tune to himself
He said: Dog-gone, I wish I had some words to that tune
But all I've got is the melody

Just then he came to a little bridge
And he leaned on the railing looking down at the brook
There was a big old bullfrog, hopping from bank to bank

Well, the bullfrog looked up and saw the farmer and decided to show off
He took an extra special big hop
He landed, splash in the water and got himself all wet
The farmer laughed and laughed and started singing

Way down south in the yankety-yank
A bull frog jumped from bank to bank
Just because he'd nothing better for to do
He stubbed his toe and fell in the water
You could hear him yell for a mile and a quarter
Just because he'd nothing better for to do

Now the farmer went walking down the road
Feeling mighty proud of himself for making up a song
He went down to the corner store
Bought himself some groceries
A pair of work gloves and a plug of chewing tobacco
And said: Oh, before I go, I have to sing you my new song

Go on home, says the storekeeper
I'm busy here, can't you see all these customers?
I won't pay you any money unless you let me sing you my song
Well, sing it and get it over with then, said the storekeeper

The farmer began to sing and the man in the store cried out
That's a wonderful song, gather round everybody, we'll have a party
And he passed round the free Coca Colas
And the free soda-crackers, and everyone was stamping on the floor

Meanwhile, all the wives and children back home
We're sitting down to supper, and, where's father?
The mother said: Children
You better run down to the corner store and fetch your old man
He's probably down there wasting his time as usual

So all the children run down the road
They run inside the corner store
You know, they heard all that music
They forgot about coming home
The children started singing
And they were passing around the free Coca-Colas and

Now, in every farmhouse it was the same situation
The mother said to themselves
This has gone far enough
Supper's getting cold
Expect us to work all the day nobody showed up?

They reached over on the stove
And grabbed some heavy frying pans
And start down the road with a mad look in their eyes
Somebody's going to get beaned

Well, they get near and they hear all that pretty music
And they forget all about being mad
They drop the frying pans in the gutter, walk into the store
And the mothers start singing

Way down yonder in the yankety-yank
A bullfrog jumped from bank to bank
And they're passing round the free Coca-Colas
And the free soda crackers, and everybody is stamping on the floor

Meanwhile, out in the barns all the cows started talking
Where is everybody?
We're supposed to be milked and it's getting mighty uncomfortable
So the cows left their stalls, they wobbled out of the barn
And down the road right into the corner store

And the cows started singing
Moo, moo, moo, moo, moo moo, moo, moo, moo, moo
And the cow's tails were swishing out the windows
And they were stamping on the floor
And drinking the free Coca-Colas and eating the free soda

Out in the barnyard all the chickens said
Where is everybody?
We're supposed to be fed and we're getting hungry
So the chickens hopped over the fence
Hopped down the road, hopped into the store
And the chickens started
And the chicken were stamping on the floor and drinking the free Coca C

Meanwhile, all the barns started talking to each other
We feel mighty lonely, they said, without any cows or any chickens
I guess we'll have to go find them
So the barns picked themselves off their foundations
And galumphed down the road
And s-q-you-e-e-z-e-d themselves into that corner store, believe it or not

Did you ever hear a rusty hinge on a barn door?
That's the way the barns sang: Eh-eh

Out in the fields all the grass says
Where is everybody? The cows are supposed to come and eat us
I guess we'll have to go find them
And the grass picked itself up and swished off down the road
And swished right into the store and started singing
Sh-sh-sh-sh-sh-sh-sh
Sh-sh-sh-sh-sh-sh-sh

Of course, when the grass was gone
The fields were gone, so the brook didn't have any banks to flow between
It said: I've got to go someplace
So it bubbled down the road
It bubbled right up into the corner store and the brook started
Bubbl-bubbl-bubbl-bubbl-bubbl-bubbl-bubbl

The brook was bubbling up and down the stairway
The grass was growing out the chimney
Feathers flying through the air
Cow tails swishing through the windows
Everybody stamped on the floor and drinking the free Coca-Cola
And eating the free soda-crackers

Meanwhile, there's the bullfrog in mid-air

He looks down, there's nothing underneath him
He looks over and there's no bank to land on
He says: Where am I?
And he starts hopping down the road
Hop! Hop! Hop! Hop! Hop!

Hey, what's all that racket down at the corner store?
Says the frog

Why they're singing?
They're singing about me
And he was so proud he puffed himself up with pride
And he puffed, and he puffed, and he puffed, and he, boom

He exploded. Cows, barns, chickens, farmers
The whole corner store went up in the air
And everybody floated down
And landed right where they were supposed to have been all the time
They all sat down eating supper again
Feeling kind of foolish for themselves

Next day they went out to find the frog
They looked high, they looked low
Coca-Cola's bottles and soda crackers in all directions. But no frog

So all there is left of the frog is the song
We might as well sing 'er once again
Way down yonder in the yankety-yank