I Ride Girls

Me ma says bless ya, don't cause a scene
But I've had more girls than her rosary's seen
Took her home, said I'd teach her to sew
Ended up neckin' by the turf fire glow

Yer man in the frock said we're bound for hell
But I came twice and I ride well
Call me sinner? You poor blind feck
She came harder than yer priest's weak neck

Don't tell the priest I ride girls, ya shite!
I'm deep in her drawers every Saturday night
Fuck yer Mass and yer holy pearls
Say three Hail Marys, I'll still ride girls

Took her to the flats by Thomondgate
Licked her clean on her granny's plate
She moaned like banshees, legs all wide
While the statue o' Jesus looked horrified

Yer man at confession near fainted dead
When I told him what I did in Eimear's bed
Said: You're a disgrace with yer filthy mouth
But he was gaspin' when I went south

Don't tell the priest I ride girls, ya prick
He's too busy thinkin' with his holy dick
Let him clutch beads and damn my curls
I'll still spit truth and I'll still ride girls

I'm not yer wife, not yer feckin' bride
I'm a cunt with boots and too much pride
Yer da'd weep if he heard me moan
But his daughter calls me when she's alone

I don't need lads, I don't play meek
I've had thighs round my head every day this week
If that's a sin, then I'll sin hard
While you toss off soft in yer Mammy's yard

Don't tell the priest I ride girls, you cowards
I've screamed into pillows in convent showers
I'll scorn yer saints, I'll smirk at yer whirls
Get on yer knees, I still ride girls