Equals

Well, he was not a close friend, he was hardly a friend at all
I was as surprised as you'd be when he asked if we could call
He said
I've been scrolling through my contacts, but there's no one left to text
I just needed to talk to someone who doesn't hate me yet

I'd engaged in some debating of his guilt with folks I knew
There was something in his voice that said the worst of it was true
Oh, they've really done it to me, I can't bear to hear my name
I used to know my real one, now it's covered up with shame

Without a defense I stand
And ask if there's something left to save
'Cause what was the point of these hands
If they could give nothing but pain?

If I'm not what I'm supposed to be
If the front can't hold anymore
Could you retain any hope in me?
Or leave me to drown in the feedback, cords 'round my feet, jackdaw at my breast
The devil's familiar comes every night
He's listening to every breath
And am I guilty again?
And is that all that I am?

I have laughed it off as crazy in the company of peers
But as you are my equal I'll be honest with you here
That it's way too raw to talk about with the distance that I'd like
I don't feel good about it now and I won't when I look back

Without a defense I stand
And ask you to take me back again
'Cause what was the point of these hands
If they could give nothing but pain?

Oh, that hero you thought
Could show you the light from the distance
And now that you know that I'm not
Could you get by with the difference?
By with the difference?
By with the difference?