Whatever

Your message hits at 2 AM
I pretend I didn't see
Read it once
Read it twice
Cross out your street
In a notebook I keep from me

You say everything's fine
But I feel the opposite here
That half-open smile
Like you're asking me not to disappear

I always trip
On the things I don't say
I say I'm over it
But I never walk away

Between what I say and what I feel
There's a whatever underneath
I say I'm fine
But I'm lying
You know
You know

I get lost
If you stay
I repeat
Till I run out of breath
Between what I say and what I feel
You read what I never write down

You laugh at my dramas
Say I always overreact
But you know every fire
I keep hidden from us like that

I play calm like I'm okay
Turn my fear into a joke
Like a beautiful movie
With an ending cut too close

I always trip
On the things I don't say
I say I'm over it
But I never walk away

Between what I say and what I feel
There's a whatever underneath
I say I'm fine
But I'm lying
You know
You know

I get lost
If you stay
I repeat
Till I run out of breath
Between what I say and what I feel
You read what I never write down

What if I stop pretending it doesn't hurt? (Hey)
What if I say out loud everything I avoid in us?
Would you run
Or sing it with me?

Between what I say and what I feel
There's a whatever underneath
I say I'm fine
But I'm lying
You know
You know