Flowey vs. Monika - Undertale Vs. Doki Doki Literature Club. Rap Battle!

Howdy!
I haven't seen you 'round here
Someone oughta show you how things work 'round here!
Down here, we share love through little white
Friendliness pellets
So run into the rounds here!

Wow, you really are an idiot!
Not even the one you're after was that oblivious!
Why would anyone pass up an opportunity
To show a stupid teen
What controlling the world truly means?

The future needs a God
And I'm the prince of all monsters
While your antics would just land you
In the principal's office!
Just a mean girl desperate for the love you seek
But you're empty inside
Just like me

So, why don't you sit down back in your book club?
I'll be on my way
Won't be the first time you're stood up!
'Cause you idolize a guy
You've never met
I've met Mettaton fans
Who are less obsessed!

The human I call out for
Is a twisted individual
But you could never be them
'Cause you're simply too predictable!
You read the one rule here wrong, you dimwit!
Hell
It's kill or be killed, not kill yourself

Oh, this is why Yuri's been strange
The leaf from her tea has been acting deranged!
Oh, forget about that, just pay attention to me
I'll go ahead and check the index, see what's stemmed from this weed
Let's see

What began as Monsterkind's hope turned to misery
Asriel had passed and a war path was the contingency
The king decreed
But the queen had disagreed
She felt it was fit to leave
Now both sit in shame as a little weed

Sprouted in the garden then a lizard web
Took it down to her lab
Gave it human's will to be
But all it did is sit and weep because it couldn't feel
And I mean literally
Then he failed to kill himself
Like he failed to kill the beat

When on to do everything there is to see
From reading all the dialogue
To going on a killing spree
Till a kid defeated him
That's about all for his history
Hey, I just had a bit of an epiphany!

Sit with me, I know you just love long rhyme schemes
And I can provide them
Just one slight fee
If the message wasn't clear from the one song I lead
I don't want your soul
Your love's all I need

Hey, let's get back on track
This is battle rap!
Not some dating app
You lovesick freak
You're not clever 'cause you're breaking the rules
All that means is this president
Is gonna get impeached

Aww, look at him wriggle, this flora's adorable!
Big talk from the one floored in the tutorial
My lesson for the day, your verse isn't jack
Last time someone let you cook, you almost murdered your dad

Ok, I follow you
And by that I mean I followed you
Inside your hallowed walls
And I saw all you do

Made their happy thoughts be cruel
Drove them all crazy!
Filled your worlds with more bugs
Than one of Muffet's pastries

I've reset the world dozens of times
You've always been the same
An attention-seeking brat
That's second class
To her friends

Maybe if you didn't trick them
Into snapping their necks
There'd be a world out there for you
With a happier end!

Want to talk bugs? You should not play
With your reality held together with scotch tape
I got brought back, check out the plus
While Fox left for Deltarune and you were left in the dust

You're outdated
I was out dating my love
While the one you called out for was breaking you up!
It's time to be a fucking hero 'cause I'm ending a weed
And moving on from this game like it's 2018!

You couldn't flip a script if you tried!
And don't call me out of date
When on your first date, you died!
Maybe I just wasn't clear with the rules of this land
So let me try another way that you'll understand
Keep your—
What?
Wait, not yet

Howdy!
I haven't seen you 'round here
Someone oughta show you
How things work 'round here
Down here you'll be ripped to
Pixels, blood, guts
Did you think I'd be satisfied killing you just once?

Don't look stressed
You must be used to
Seeing everything reset
I'd say when it comes to nightmares
I'm the best you're gonna get
You wanted to see
What's beyond the monitor screen
I hope you're happy seeing
Your new home belonging to me

Feeling left out from all of
Souls in my grasp?
It's a shame you gave yours away
To be thrown in the trash!
I'll kill you again and again
Each death ending painfully
I tower monsters, humans
And whatever AI you claim to be!

You hanged me out to dry
Because I'd want them before you

That's a knife to the gut
But that's just Monika for you

I'm a manipulative dictator
That's filled with hatred!
I'll kill all my friends
And blame my victim
When eliminated!

(Warning! Warning!)
Flowey's not going the pacifist route!
(Warning! Warning!)
Locusts and nuclear weapons inbound!
(Warning! Warning!)
Even after getting
Smashed to the ground
(Warning! Warning!)
Monika's about to open her mouth!

You think I'm scared by some plant
Barking nonstop with orders
But I'm not put off by
Little photo-shop of horrors

You're not the God that you thought
I got this in the bag
I can still end this battle by—
Oh, Jesus Christ!

Oh, did
I say you could load in?
No?
Then if you don't want to get ripped
In two, then sit with closed lips
Know this
Thinking with emotions
It's how you end up soulless
While I stole six

Go for another attempt
At a metaverse server
Go and scream into the void
For all the friends that you murdered
Try and go on your date
When you're broken and maimed
And you open your save
You'll find nobody came

Wow
That got out of hand pretty quickly, huh?
Hey, wai-i-i-i-i-!