I’m Not Getting Excited

I'm not getting excited
'Cause the thrill isn't mine to invite in
Just the chill when I learn
That it's finally my turn
I have finally earned
My place in the urn
And I take a fall
But I keep my hands soft
I keep my body limp
And I move with the wind
I'll go where it bends
And the goal or the expectation

I'm not getting excited
'Cause the line on my phone's got me hiding
When it flashes at night
It's the bringer of signs
I can see through my eyelids
I know that it's time
And I hold it all
But I keep my hands soft
For the answer in asking
My thoughts are a wreck
And there's no point untangling
The thought from the action
I'm awake

Why is it like the other side
Where all my vital signs are fading away
Violent dreams keep me awake
I wear the same face in the morning
A warning

Not getting excited
'Cause my fight and my flight are divided
And so I don't enthuse
Keep my grip on joy loose
And I wait for the news
With my feet in my shoes
And I lose it all
With one foot out the door
When I smile I lie
With my eye to the side
So I agree with goodbye
I agree with goodbye
Goodbye

But why is it like the other side
Where all my vital signs are fading away
Violent dreams keep me awake
I wear the same face in the morning
A warning
A warning