Um, It's Kind Of a Lot

I'm afraid of leaving my house
I'm afraid of dying of cancer
I'm afraid of black sedans, white vans, and computers
I'm afraid of losing my mind
I'm afraid of windows and airplanes
I'm afraid of my past, my fans, and my future

But I never been afraid of no one breaking my heart
It's not like I'm 'bout to fall and cut my throat on the shards
And I'm afraid of damn near everything

All my life's a panic trip, a rocket ship to planet schizoid
Hold me like a tourniquet, and I'll you, like an iron maiden
I've grown used to fear
But no, not to you yet, my dear
Oh, I love you so much it scares me half to death
I'm not used to this
How did it happen, baby?
Oh, I love you so much it scares me half to death
The other half, I guess, I'm giving to you
Oh, baby

Oh, I'm afraid that you'll change your mind
I'm afraid there's somebody better
I'm afraid of four-letter words, like love, for
And ever, or whatever
And I'm afraid you'll notice all my flaws
I'm afraid you already have, obviously
And I'm afraid I'll come on too strong
Hold you too tight and scare you too

But I never been afraid to wear my heart on my sleeve
At least to prove I'm weak and if you cut me I'll bleed
Could you be the light my X-rays need?

All my life's a Duchovny role
Oh, Gillian, you won't believe this
Spit me out, you don't know where I've been
Hold me at claw's length, baby
I'm not used to fear of losing something I hold dear

Oh, I love you so much it scares me half to death
I'm not used to this
How did it happen, baby?
Oh, I love you so much it scares me half to death
The other half I guess I'm giving to you
Oh, baby!

I'll twist my words: A clever turn of phrase
Sorry, darling, please excuse my
Constant need to self-aggrandize
Coddling my narcissism
M.A.D. come ride my A-bomb
While I beg you to say I'm okay

So here's one last lyric to sum up these
Thoughts I struggled to come up with
To make me sound deep and smart and
Then I promise I'll shut up
Wait, let me think
Hold on, I got this
Anything but I'm in love with you

I love you so much it scares me half to death
How should I put this
How did this happen, baby?
Oh, I love you so much it scares me half to death
The other half I guess I'm giving to you
Oh, baby!