Don't Go Up There

I have to go to marquette to attend a seminar
Do they have motels up there and roads to drive my car
No, leave your car below the bridge cause there's no roads up there
They'll put you up in a tent so bring long underwear
I knew a guy who had an aunt whose cousin had a friend
Who once went up above the bridge and was never seen again
He was trampled by a moose or eaten by a bear
Or scalped by those indians who still run wild there
Chorus:
Don't go up there, stay where you're at
Don't go up there you wont come back
They don't have no electric lights to keep away the wolves at night
They don't have no law and order stay down here below the border
Stay where you're at don't go up there you won't come back

I heard there was a native tribe way up in the woods
They call them jackpine savages and they don't speak so good
Ya they all carry guns and knives and great big tomahawks
And their women do their laundry beating clothes against the rocks
I wanna go vacationing way up in the s00
Should i bring along some cash or will my plastic do
Once you get above the bridge hire yourself a guide
He'll take you there by dog sled for forty beaver hide

Chorus:
Don't go up there stay where you're at
Don't go up there you wont come back
They don't have no shopping malls they live like neanderthals
They don't have no stores or fridges stay down here below the bridge
Stay where you're at don't go up there you wont come back

In july i'm going to yooperland to go swimming in the lake
I'll bring some suntan lotion what else should i take
You better bring an ax along for chopping through the ice
And wear a thermal diving suit to guard against frostbite
I wanna go to yooperland to live a peaceful life
Tell me what i have to do to be a yooper wife
You gotta build an outhouse and skin and cook a deer
And snowshoe to the trading post when you're out of beer

Don't go up there stay where you're at
Don't go up there you won't come back
They don't have no jumbo jets no telephones no tv sets
They don't have no running water stay down here below the border
Stay where you're at don't go up there you wont come back