Familiar Pain

I chose you knowing how it ends
Still walked right back into it again
Some pain feels safer when it's known
Than hoping for something I can't hold

I told myself I'd be okay
I lie to myself in familiar ways

This pain knows my name
Feels like home, feels the same
I run from peace, I chase the ache
This love hurts, but it's familiar pain

Your silence fills the room tonight
I read your lies between the lines
I say I'll leave, I say I'll go
But comfort lives in what I know

I swear I'll change, I swear I'll try
But something in me wants this cry

This pain knows my face
Every tear stays in its place
I lose myself, but still remain
Inside this warm, familiar pain

Maybe healing feels like nothing
When hurt is all I've known
I don't crave the wounds you gave me
I'm just scared to be alone
If peace feels like a stranger
Then pain's where I stay

This pain won't disappear
But at least it stays sincere
I don't know what love should be
But this familiar pain is me