Dread

We cover our sorrows with one gentle smile, how else could we live if not for denial?
I've seen this before, I've walked in those shoes.
With a gun in my hand and nothing to lose.

A few drinks down my throat, one thought on my mind, how simple it is to leave life behind.

And as I sat at the edge of my bed, my left hand the gun, my right hand the lead.
A boy walked through the walls in tears, crying to me every one of his fears.
Laying in bed in a room with no light.
A mother and sister who fight every night.
The thought of a father he hopes isn't there, praying to someone who won't seem to care.

This is my chance to leave it all behind, I'm at the end I'm running out of time.
A few drinks down my throat one thought on my mind.

We cover our sorrows with one gentle smile, how else could we live if not for denial?

So there I sat at the edge of my bed, my left hand the gun, my right hand the lead.
The last thing he said before leaving me be, is "I won't forgive you if you're the death of me."

Am I sleeping? Or am I dead?
Is my heart beating? Is this the end?