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Past The Eulogy

Victimizer

Sweeping the leaves from my family's name
Cleaning the stone engraved symbol
Her given name slowly appears from under my hands again
I light the candles and burn the sticks of increase
At times I need to breathe in these fumes
To set aside all signs of a brutal world
The flower seeds rise up from the dirt and bloom
They stop the blood in these veins from running cold

What was the meaning of this drama this stillborn
Breathing in hard thinking of the memory trying to recall
Why was my life so suddenly disturbed, destroyed and torn
Why me why was she the one chosen to fall
There is no sense in pointing out the blame
Those kind of words have yet failed to maintain
In that I will never find an answer
In my life now there is no energy for this type of anger

A thousand times I've stared into the deep
And still thinking about the eulogy time after time
All these lonely tears they fell like snowflakes down my cheek
Look at my face and tell me please am I doing ok?
A thousand times I've cried myself to sleep
But waking up again with the same sorrow day after day
Somebody please pull me up I'm sinking way too deep
Fortunately so many hands are reaching out for me

There are so many things in life
I still have a chance to gain
I can finally stitch up these sore wounds and see
I can believe in these words because they carry my pain
Because they carry my pain
Carry my pain!

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