Well, I always thought that cows
Looked prettier in a field
Than on my plate at supper
Being served in a meal

And I never did like hamburgers
I never did like steak
I prefer chickens cackling instead of
Fried, cooked, or baked

Well, I stopped eating animals
And I'm glad I finally did
But I get my protein
'Cause I eat kids

Well, it used to be a problem
Just eating rice and beans
And I think you probably know
Exactly what I mean

And I never really knew if I was
Eating all I should
But I don't have that problem now
And it feels pretty good

Well, I stopped eating animals
And I'm glad I finally did
But I get my protein
'Cause I eat kids

So it's goodbye liver
Goodbye roast beef
Hello Tommy
Michael, and Denise

I don't eat chicken
No, I don't eat cows
I don't eat animals
I eat children now

Well, I stopped eating animals
And I'm glad I finally did
But I get my protein
'Cause I eat

Kids
Kids
Kids!